L is for Li-Lo

Five years ago I posted this Unknown Figures post, Peter Evans kindly identified the Li-Lo within days - if not hours - and I finally got a bead on the lower set on evilBay the other day, and I was right about it being a shooting game, Hong Kong, generic. The three poses seem to be 'it' but I can't now find it in the Unknown HK folder which means it was 'brand' named, but I can't remember where I filed it...it wasn't Gordy, Larami, Laurie, LP or Lucky - I just looked!

Anyway, back to Li-Lo...this turned-up a while ago. From the warping it's either a very unstable polystyrene or some earlier cellulose or phenolic resin? Actually marked Lilo. It's missing a draw-bar/handle thing.

In the UK Li-Lo were best know in my childhood for being the manufacturers of a vast range of polyvinyl (PVC) inflatable beds or mattresses, 'floatation devices', balls, rings and other beach/camping toys, to the point that they became synonymous with them, we had 'lilos' not inflatables! I don't know if/what they may have made/sold elsewhere....did you have Li-Lo where you are?

I'm willing to bet that the 'oversized' figure in the original post was sold with this as a beach toy, either a few together in a larger polythene bag, probably with a card header, or in a mesh-net attached to this. Pure conjecture, so don't add it to any wants lists, but that is exactly the sort of combination you'd see hanging in bunches at seaside kiosks, or further inland at the back of cycle or sporting-goods shops. There may have been a set of paper flags glued onto cocktail sticks or little wooden spills as well.

Ten minutes after publishing...there was an Australian arm, the UK parent-company had another name and Lilo is still a generic term for inflatable beds! I've also tracked down a few catalogues/adverts so will do their - now three - entries for the A-Z in a day or two...maybe!

C is for Combat Soldiers

I can't remember if this has been on the Blog or not? I took the shot back in '07 or '08, so if it hasn't it's high time it did! Rather crappy photograph I'm afraid, I was still getting to grips with flash and the macro settings, but rather crappy figures, so: ...

...the earlier 60-mils from Marx, two gunner/loaders but no gun and two guys doing PT with a grenade, but I always quite liked the squatting/sitting firer, a very decent bit of sculpting - the chap with a rifle that is; the bazooka-man's going over backwards any second now!

M is for More toys tomorrow...

...Libya, Nigeria, Mali, Tunisia, Egypt...Crimea, Ukraine, Georgia, Transdniestria, Moldova... Indonesia, Sri Lanka, Burma . . . Peru, Mexico, Columbia...

Religious zealots, drug cartels, Marxist/Leninist ideologues, 'genuine' revolutionaries...we're all one species and we better find a way of getting along together soon, or there'll be no planet left worth living on.

With thanks to the artist Lee Marej for letting me use his image:

Deviant Art
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S is for Sickened

Funny how 129 French deaths get the entire Internet going red, white and blue, but 224 Russian deaths went unmourned by the same keyboard warriors a couple of weeks ago!

But then...Slavs? Not much better than brown people, huh?

The false wailing and gnashing of teeth, the metaphorical wearing of sackcloth and ashes, the mawkish sentimentality, the idea that millions of people were taken by surprise...again! Fuck Off! Middle-class, middle-aged, pro-establishment (the real problem), uneducated, fakery.

Grow up and educate yourselves, before it's too late. Read 1984 and watch the rush to push through Draconian law-enforcement legislation with open eyes, read Catch 22 and listen to the politico's speeches through open ears . . . I'll be standing over here in despair!

N is for Not Suprised

Who are we at war with? Eastasia or Eurasia?

Image - Wkipedia

It's the white bit we need to worry about as it's entirely a construct of Western intervention, colonialism, slavery, empire building and corporate land- and resource-grabs.

The only thing that surprises me about the last 16 hours is that people are still surprised! Orwell and Huxley warned us this was our future, how can we be surprised? Kafka and Heller patiently explained the madness we operate in and tolerate, how can we be surprised?

The answer - of course - is that the average citizen is a selfish, stupid, frightened creature with an abysmal knowledge of world affairs, his own country's political situation or the effects of capital on himself, those around him and the ecology of the entire planet.

It is a fact that in the next few days the sales of private body-armour (never to be worn) will go up, in countries that allow them (America) the sale of guns will peak this afternoon, and yet, tomorrow, the world will only have become slightly less safe!

If you are feeling surprised today; worried, confused, maybe a little frightened...my advice is go out and purchase another movie channel, subscribe to the new Games Workshop mechanism, buy a new iPhone, get a scarf. You can never have too many scarves in the scarf drawer. Order a pizza with ALL the extras. It's what the rulers want you to do, carry on as normal, ignoring the fact that normal is the root of the problem. The root of all the problems.

Oh, and you could get CCTV throughout the house, as you'll be doing a future government a favour if you prepare in advance of legislation!

To quote (misquote?) Private Baldrick -

Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupiddidy stupid.

T is for Toy Story

Following-up on one of my 'general' posts from last year, this is what the Disney/Mattel pull-train Toy Story figures looked like when their bases were smoothed-off.

Not too shabby...

T is for "Take your stinking paws off me you damn dirty ape!"

Except that of course the message of the early films in an ultimately arse-ripped franchise (and the truth) is that we are the damn, dirty, filth. Apes are trying to live their lives as we eat them, plough-up their lands and burn their forests...oh yeah...AND try to beat them to death when they run from the flames...

Japanese company AHI's Doctor Zaius (pronounced Zeus) on a wind-up, clicky-clacky 'running' horse, he's missing his rifle which should be slung over his shoulder.

He knew we were the 'damn dirty' apes, and twisted his science and his religion in order to preserve the status quo...a very Human trait.

L is for Le Drapeau Tricolore de Starlux

From Starlux, a tri-coloured Flag!

French Paratrooper standard bearer, older moulding on the left in each shot, newer on the right, points to note, older version has rounded base, blanco gaiters painted on, painted belt and gold highlights on beret and flag. It also has the 'Starlux' recessed in the base, the later one has the mark standing proud and has been repaired.

Thanks to Samwise Gamgee for one if not both of these?

E is for Even I play with them occasionally!

Galoob Micro-machine Paratroopers and jump instructors practice exit drills on the gymnasium floor!

C is for Clone, Copy, Counterfeit, 'Chinese Copy' and Carbon Copy

Matchbox...

...the US Infantry figures from Matchbox in 1:32 scale (top two ranks) with some of the many, larger copies. That's it, file clear of Picasa! Oh yeah...for some reason they did a limited run in 'German' grey-blue plastic?

N is for Not as Rare as Unicorn Shit

Another one from 99p stores...heay, if you're on a tight budget and you've got a Blog to feed...My Little Mystical Ponies!

Turns out that while the shit's hard to find the animals can be picked-up by the bagful! Now the merger deal between 99p Stores and Poundstretcher (or Poundland? I did go into it a while ago!) has been given the green light some of these in-house brands may disappear, whether PMS goes with the Unicorns or stays perhaps re-'branded' to Funtastic is anyone's guess.

Now to get 16 new posts out quick to push this off the bottom of the page, before someone who knows me sees this shit! They're out there if you want them...

O is for Ospedale

Slowly clearing Picasa, these get their 15 minutes in the limelight, carded and definitely paying 'homage' to Marx...Dulcop's figures - in this case - being around 50mm.

I've seen a set of these on evilBay recently with all combat figures, but this set is 'enhanced' (in the loosest sense of the word) with some dolls-house type accessories and a dressing-up/joke syringe!

If you find these lose, you're going to think they are Hong Kong piracies, but they are Italian product as far as I know, just poor quality 'infant' toys.

I is for Ittsy-bittsy, Teeny-weeny, Khaki Over All Tankeenis!

Owh! I shouldn't be allowed! But they are very small...and khaki....

Compared to a 1:76th'ish figure (Quaker Gladiator...not Kellogg's!) who was to hand, the main subject here is a Cracker-toy/Gum-ball novelty, closest to a Churchill and around N-gauge scale if it's any specific size!

While the one in the bag is a scale-down to about 1:144th, probably of/based on the UPC copies of the Roco-Minitanks M44/53/55 family of SPG's but with elements of a Stüg to the front glacis and having a revolving turret! I'm pretty sure I have a made-up one in storage with an equally small British-looking armoured car, so they were probably sold as both kits and complete [capsule] toys, but don't quote me until I've shown them here!

C is for Cartoon Card Craft

Two years ago I found this rather neat download, I think I flagged it up at the time in a 'News, Views...', anyway I had a stab at it, took some photographs and it's been languishing in Picasa ever since! Watching Ed Berg re-design his fire house reminded me this was sitting there...

I think it was three sheets of cut-outs, with lots of white between the pieces - for littler fingers? Or for those impossibly blunt, plastic-handled 'craft' scissors they always issue in primary/junior school!

Disney's Babes in Toyland marching toy soldier, about 6-inches high! How cool is that? here...make your own. Quite a festive thing too and I'm no fan of Disney, but it's out there, it's a Toy Soldier and the kids love this stuff at Christmas!

If I were to have another stab at it, I'd print it off and sit it on a radiator, or in the sun and give it five to ten thin coats of hairspray first; I found that the bits which required the most work (arms and legs which needed rolling round a pencil) started to wear-off, I think because I used the studio printer which was a big machine using powder cartridges or something?

Another download here (Century 21 JR21) brought to my attention by the boys at Moonbase proved less successful however...

...the TV21 Snow Train: Started OK, but I glued the back on the cab thinking I was being clever and getting the shape to hold while I wrestled with the windscreen, but of course I needed to flatten the tabs down with tweezers or a long sticky thing (like...a stick?) from the end I'd just sealed-up...Doh!

All the remaining cut-out bits and the cab are now in a Douwe Egbert's coffee jar waiting for a new plan...it'll be a long wait - I fear. There was a really nice one on Moonbase, made properly by someone proper, but I can't find it, can anyone from there give us a link?

R is for Roswell!

I saw a UFO once. I'm not a great fan of UFOlogy and don't often tell the tale, there were about 60 of us, on our final 25-miler in basic training, we'd not been long dropped-off from the transport so about 2/2.30 AM, when we noticed a light which seemed to be in the cloud base, which was very low.

The light would move out to the horizon and back, then go off to the horizon again in another direction. It never seemed to change speed, even when turning 90º ('on a sixpence'), it never lost focus (never getting larger toward the horizon or smaller toward the apex - ruling-out a searchlight of some kind), it never seemed to brake the clouds it was enveloped in (never appearing brighter or dimmer) and it never disappeared (ruling-out a headlight climbing into and out-of the Welsh valleys).

After about 40 minutes or so of muttering and passing of the news up the line the Platoon Commander sent the NCO's back to tell us, "Yes, it's a UFO, no one will believe us, keep it to yourselves" and within the hour we'd all grown bored of watching it and tucked-in for the march, so never noticed if is disappeared of its own volition, or with the coming of the dawn?

Needless to say, I was telling the tale a few years later in Tea Break at a warehouse I was working in, when Reg James said "I believe you", I said "Thanks Reg" in a slightly patronising tone, as you would if you thought someone was patronising you! "No!" he said; "I really do believe you, I've heard the exact same story from one of your NCO's in the mess at Lichfield years ago!" We already knew we'd been in the same Division.

Turned out that after telling us all to keep schtüm, the NCO's had gone straight to their mess, had a couple of beers and blabbed the whole thing! Don'cha just hate middle-managers!

I don't think it was aliens, indeed the fact that it occurred over a busy MOD training area - Sennybridge (SENTA) - makes me sure that while it WAS an 'unidentified' object (in the sky), it contained no little green men, or 'Greys and Browns' as the UFOlogists call the types below.

Equally, as far as I know nothing has entered military service since (this occurred in November 1984) that might reproduce the effect, so it is either 'still in development' or something we are - to date - not permitted to know about...oooh! Conspiracy!...no, just realism and attempted explanation of the unexplainable.

I have a feeling the upper row (vinyl) of cartoony ones were a cereal give-away at some point in the mid-1990's early 2000's? The two to the bottom left (polyethylene) were larger capsule (gum-ball) novelties while the six greenies are current 'party favours' and while these are a complete set of all board-sports (from left to right, top to bottom: Roller Skates, Ice Skates, Snowboard? Surf Board, Skateboard and Skis), I have seen other sets of  six footballers, other ball-gamers and 'occupations', and in other colours - all in a soft polyvinyl 'jelly'.

OK guys, message passed, come and get me, I'm fed up with this stinky ball and its god-forsaken prime species anyway!