E is for Easter Funnies with Easter Bunnies

There are a lot of Easter Bunny memes out there, a lot of them are either not that funny, a bit sad, or just mawkishly sentimental, but over the years these three have made me genuinely  chuckle . . .

 

This one has been seen before here, abut 12 years ago, but is a perfect example of everything which is wrong with the Internet, it was originally a low-res copy-of-a-copy of a greeting card from here in the UK, hence 'Arse', yet if you google 'Ester bunny meme' you will find dozens and dozens of examples, Americanised with 'Butt', while many versions have been re-shot, or re-drawn, by people who want the credit for something which was someone else's idea.

 

Another version has a third bunny, missing his face going "Where are you guys?", or similar, yet the original artist is never credited, not even by me, as no one knows, presumably a Clinton's, Birthdays' (or the chain which went bust a few years ago)'s jobbing commercial artist?

I saw this a couple of years ago, and haven't seen it again.

While this also made me chuckle!

And the fact that the originators of this stuff get lost, forgotten or omitted, often on purpose by people wanting to extract a little ownership for themselves is a sad indictment of what's wrong with us, we are losing our humanity, and our altruism, which are (were?) our 'Darwinian' strengths in a world made harder to navigate by a thousand tongues and the [necessary?] evil of economics!

More here; https://www.care.com/c/funny-easter-memes/

W is for We Never Learn From History.

 Guy Venables in The Metro . . . 

Beyond the jokes is the realisation that everything which has happened since Thatcher/Ragan (1979/80) has taken us back to where we were in 1939/40, the Right on the rise everywhere, nations ignoring international or pan-national treaties to vie for power and influence, a fascist state (Israel) exterminating a populace (the Palestinians) they have passed dozens of discriminatory laws (72 I believe) against, while the populations' recovering from a decade of austerity following the failure of the money markets, are going to be expected to fight and die in a probably global war, to keep the 'Rich & Powerful' wealthy and in power. While the League of . . . sorry, 'United' Nations becomes an irrelevance, and international courts are ignored by the people who set them up.

A is for Apparently . . . .

 . . . it's national thesaurus day, somewhere!

 

"I successfully predict that upon which you cogitate; did I empty the ammunition storage chambers, or only partially expend their contents? And - should you wish to be appraised of the facts - in all the preceding, heated kerfuffle, I appear to have purely failed to register that data? Therefore, the quandary with which you have to present yourself, is thusly - Do you feel blessed with good fortune, juvenile delinquent? Verily, comment upon that?"

"The pinnacle of the planetary sphere, mother, the pinnacle of the planetary sphere!"

 "The advancing object is in no way a Luna body!" . . . "It's a moment of captive deceit!"

"It's a form of existence, Jim, but in a manner we would not comprehend it as, in the normal course of events."  

"May the measure of nonequilibrium accompany you, adolescent Skywalker!" 

B is for Bah! Humbug!

 

 

Here's to those that wish us well,

All the rest can go to Hell.

Here's to those that wish us luck,
All the rest can go to phuq.

 

I snuck both the last two posts of 2023 in, with seconds to go! Fireworks are muted this year, but we beat the previous third-best year by eleven posts, and got the first hundred-post month, so that'll do me!

TITM is for Toys in the Media - The Rest . . . For Now!

These are all the other things in a folder it'll be nice to see the back off for a bit, as they've been sitting around in Picasa for about three years now! Vaguely in order of their being deposited in the folder, with something a little different at the end!

Full page spread in The Metro or 'i', probably CGI'd Russian nesting dolls advertising a give-back to the LGBTQI+ community by Paddy Power . . . every time Russia scoured a goal, money went to Putin's hated gays! The funny thing is, I susspect Putin's an every-way predatory deviant . . . but the witnesses are probably all in the ground, except his poor ex-wife who's in internal exile in Kaliningrad!

And it's nice to see that while I was earning my own opprobrium from 'over there' for questioning some of the 'eastern' production, its promotion, price and where - exactly - the money was going, other - more mainstream - sources were also realising Russia was not a friend - of anybody.

Oh, I'll have plenty more to say on the subject, don't you worry . . . unless you're in the Penn-State Toy Soldier mafia, in which case you may well worry? I'll name you because you put your names to your insensitive comments, lacking all self-awareness, or awareness of the greater world picture, you nasty little, right-wing, selfish, brain-dead shitheads.

Taken before I'd got my new scanner, and sadly out of focus, but you can see it's Kenco using some cheapo, substitute vinyl-rubber, rack-toy Chinnamals to advertise their excellent granulated goodness! Yeah-nah-yeah, I used to take Kenco, before I realised Douwe Egbert's gave me an unending supply of self-seal storage jars!

I like this one, on one level it's a pretty non-descript advert for something your subconscious will ignore the instant you realise it's not for you, but on another level it's using a toy frog to trigger the large-print tagline, while the toy bus reinforces both the toy/key-ring motive, and that it's about two drivers, one having more useful insurance coverage than the other - get on the back of your better insured friend, or get the bus!

I think this and the previous were taken from copies of The Economist?

This is more of a joke-ad', I can't remember where from, but something like The New Yorker, circa 1960's, maybe something more mainstream like Mad Magazine? It is however; still 'toys in the media' and came via Brain Heiler's Facebook group I think?

Two from my Facebook feed, following the same trope of using a model house to sell on-line Estate Agency (Real Estate) services. The two buildings are quite different so may have separate origins, and I wonder if they might be houses for gerbils or other small pets, or maybe money-banks strategically posed to hide the coin slots?

Touristy/novelty pound/dollar-store stuff, though, I think? However - from the size of the hands - very useful for war-gaming in 54/60mm scales. Both could pass for Western Europe or New England and both are pretty simple, timeless designs.

Back to an old trope here, previously seen on a couple of book covers and a health thing; the model-kit runner. Here employed as street-furniture outside the Japanese HQ of Shizuoka Models, incorporating a post box, there are similar constructions around the plant's wider site, some in blue.

Real-steam steam-rollers (probably Mamod - the current Model 1312 [short version] looks almost the same) being used to sell the luxurious smoothness of Cormar carpets! Bry-Nylon was that terrible stuff which snagged you fingernails, skinned your knees and gave you shocks if you had the wrong footwear . . . and the shit which gathered in the little ravines between the fluffy-islands!! Published circa-1970; a magazine advert for awfully-awful, bloody-awful carpets.

Not a movie still, not a fan's CGI, not a 'toy in the media', and while Paddington has been seen here before now; not actually Paddington, not even a bear . . . this is a dog! A toy-dog if you like, a Pomeranian to be precise (no piccolo :-( ), who gets dressed-up as Paddington by his owner! You can't make this shit up, but he (she?) makes a very good Paddington!

H is for Happy Easter Bunny . . . Not!

 

Stolen from Todd Killinger on the Pod Stallions Faceplant group

 

S is for 'The' Shark!

It's been a funny day, I awoke convinced it was Tuesday (so I got most of the right letters), but as the day progressed I sort of grudgingly admitted to myself in a sub-concious manner that it was Tuesday yesterday, so came to accept Wednesday as the day, only for someone to start announcing special programes for the Radio tomorrow, and the dawning realisation that a long weekend starts at midnight and if I wanted milk I'd better get my skates on and get to town!

Image courtesy of The News Elephant

So I don't know where the week's gone, but half of it snuck-by while I was doing something else! Anyway, what I was going to post at tea-time took a back seat, and, as I'd scanned these last night before their box went to storage, we'll have a bit of self-indulgence!

Back around '98, I had cause to design a shark, the main parameters being that A) it had to be executable on a vinyl-cutter and B) no one in the studio would show a mere fitter (for that is what I was!) how to use the CorelDRAW software! The irony there being that now I can 3D in Autodesk and the studio bods are probably still doing 2D signage!

The above are early efforts to 'get' a shark, not as easy as I'd thought it would be when I started, also - an additional parameter - I was trying to get there from the Christian fish, but sharks 'aint fishes! As you can see, far left bottom; I got closer to barracuda and tuna at one point!

Using the tracing-over-the-previous-image technique, a seven stage process lead to something I was happy with, although the final stage (with teeth) is missing, it must have been lost in the final scanning-to-PC and cutting phase, where I did get help from Jason in the studio and when the gills and eye were added from punctuation.

Once I was happy with the design, I had 12 printed-off in three colours, of which I have six left, the others having gone on various vehicles I have owned over the intervening 25 years . . . never mind this week, where the fuck has my life gone?!! Anyway, it became 'the shark' among my friends, and when I got a new vehicle it was always "You haven't put the shark on it yet then?"

In case you're still wondering . . . this was going to go on the opposite side of the boot/tailgate, but I never got round to finalising the design or getting it cut! It's alright; they raise again on the third day, apparently, although the way I'm counting days at the moment, that'll probably be next Saturday!

I is for It Would Seem . . .

. . . that apparently the shiney rainbow mouse in my scanner is far more interesting than poxy toy soldiers . . .

. . . full set of rear beans and a muzzle! What can you do; the scan was still usable, so I left-off moving him 'till the bar had returned!

Public Service Announcement - on behalf of the Do we Really Need a 'Royalty' Party

What colour will their blood turn-out to be?

Blue as a monkey's arse - apparently.

Andrew hiding from paedo-investigations (in Woking's Pizza Express! They won't be putting that on their flyers!), the Duke dying at 99 but no one actually admitting it, Anne on girlfr . . . err . . . husband number four? Or is she single these days? Charles, well, there's that whole Diana thing before Camilla, no, after Camilla, no, before . . . oops! Edward, a right Royal stand-up, on husban . . .  err. . . wife number 1, the horrible anus thing, isn't it time we were shot of the whole freeloading, dysfunctional lot of 'em?

And the whorey old excuse that a President would be worse (the 'horrific' example used to be Berlusconi, became Farage (rhymes with c**t) and is now Trump!)* belies the fact that we don't need two heads of state, we have a Prime Minister who does all the leading-function stuff and biggly-wiggly meetings, just keep him representing us as he represents us, we ARE after-all a representative democracy, or we're supposed to be!

*Giuliani would be a better stand-in for Berlusconi! I wonder if they go to the same guy to get their hair done?

Public Service Announcement - On Trump's Progeny

 

Someone - who shall remain nameless to save him from being associated with my disrespectful shenanigans! - sent this as a follow up;

I've also seen some mock-ups of a My First Presidency (in Mattel branding?) which came with artwork suggesting further 'collectable' play sets! Personally I think he's losing his mind; Trump, not the contributor, him AND that nuttly-nuts lawyer of his!

Breaking News, Views etc. . .

The walking toilet-brush is going down like a rapist at a baby-shower . . . or . . . on 'Govey', about now!

20 is for Most Questionable Things in AMERICA'n Store Ever?

You be the decide and x all else!

https://www.thetravel.com/20-questionable-things-found-in-target-around-the-us-and-4-we-can-never-find/

Actually I can only conclude that The Travel is even easier to ire that the Daily Wail, but then I think - like this post - The Travel are being tongue in cheek while The Pail was being serious, and I'd give house-room to the octopus!

This public service announcement was brought to you in association with TJF and the PSTSM, that's a Donald-fact . . . I say so! They may deny it, but the beauty of Donald-fact's is that they don't have to be facts at all.

Horse face? If she's a horse-face he must have been kicked in the face by a horse? Ugly, cretinous, orange monkey! Yes . . . I just called your President a monkey, an orange, cretinous one, but don't worry; we've got a dancing capuchin for Prime Minister - we're all trapped together in this mindless, end-of-the-human-race clusterfuck!

He can't even spell Daniels FFS!

Or . . . is it a biggly-biggly very-presidential play-on-words? Denials? Geddit! It's not good, but we like a play-on-words here at Small Scale World, like Donald Trumps [in his pants again], geddit . . . no it's more pretty childish-stuff from the fuckwitted, meat-faced, misogynist loon - if it was meant!

He's the 'total con', thick as pig-shit, now that's a Hugh fact!

SF is for Space Farce!

Do you remember that fantastic Dr. Who Mount Rushmore that was sent to the Blog by Artist Jon Alderfer a while back? Well, he's had his coloured pencils out again, or at least I think he's working in a pencil medium, it's hard to tell from a scan of a print; it may be fine gauche or water-colour, but whatever, it's very talented work and it's a pleasure to carry another here . . . look to the horizon, there may be a third on the way?

Space Force - by Jon Alderfer

Isn't it fantastic? And I love all the little in-jokes hidden around the place, some of which I'm not getting, I'm obviously not American-enough! Sucka B. Flaunders obviously had the day off to recover from the last press conference!

If I have one criticism - using my years of experience as a world-famous art critic to go on - I'd say the pilot's hands are too big, I mean they're BIG, like, they're biggly-big, biggly-wiggly big, almost normal-sized! That's a Donald-fact - no fake news here!

Jon; thanks so much for this, delighted to host it!

T is for Traitor in Chief

Quiz Time!

Look carefully at the following random picture, and then answer the questions as honestly as you can, ticking one box each time, with your answer -

Using only the men's* body language;

1 - Try to work out which of the two men in this image is in charge of the situation?

□ A. The man on the left

□ B. The man on the right

2 - Which of these two men might have compromising video-footage of the other man?

□ A. The man on the left

□ B. The man on the right

3 - Which of these two men is confident of the validity of the vote that last got him elected/re-elected to high-office?

□ A. The man on the left

□ B. The man on the right

Results

Mostly; A's - Thanks for trying, I think we all know which way you voted in 2016. You can go back to cleaning your guns in front of your wall-mounted entertainment centre while supping that weak, gassy, beer.

Mostly B's - You knows it! You fuckin' know - the shit we're in!

* The use of 'man' or 'men' in this quiz is for ease of identifying either one or both of two narcissistic, right-wing, fascist bully-boys, happy to sacrifice their people's hopes or nation's identities on the global stage in the search for personal aggrandisement in a dying world.

M is for More toys tomorrow...

...Libya, Nigeria, Mali, Tunisia, Egypt...Crimea, Ukraine, Georgia, Transdniestria, Moldova...Indonesia, Sri Lanka, Burma...Peru, Mexico, Columbia...

Religious zealots, drug cartels, Marxist/Leninist ideologues, 'genuine' revolutionaries...we're all one species and we better find a way of getting along together soon, or there'll be no planet left worth living on.

With thanks to the artist Lee Marej for letting me use his image:

Deviant Art
Facebook

W is for WTF

We asked the Horticulture department to line-in the boundary on the cricket field, I say 'field' over 'pitch' as the grass is so long getting a ball out to the boundary can only be accomplished hitting-out with high balls, risking a catch!

They gave us a five-a-side football pitch running parallel with the wicket!

What can you do? If you don't laugh, you'll cry!!

And it's indelible!

T is for Dobbin-burgers

Sorry but I couldn't resist it!

To any Tesco's supermarket executives who may be directed here;

It's HUMOUR! It was bound to happen and it might make you check the sourcing of your 'product' a little more efficaciously!

Another one....

This is going to run and run unless it ends-up in a pre-cooked stew! These came out of a conversation we were having at lunch today (yesterday!), other gems included changing the small-print on the nutrition panels to read;

• May contain traces of more than one species
• Meat product of the European motorway network
• ...Aspartame, Monosodium Glutamate (MSG), Binding Agent (crin de cheval)....

and products such as...

• Red Rumble - A 'mixed' meat pizza
• Lassy-sagne - an honest lasagne 

J is for Just call me Wikileaks!

I found these stuffed inside a hollow log the other day, and felt that in the wider global interests of true and lasting peace, justice and democracy they should be made available as public documents...there was blood on the log...